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a string of bad things, a string of good things

April 13, 2010

You may have noticed that I haven’t posted anything on my blog for quite some time.  (And if you haven’t noticed, I won’t hold it against you.)  I have hesitated to write anything in weeks because I have had a hard time finding something positive to write about.  For the sake of the privacy of people I love, I won’t go into much detail, but in summary, I can simply say that awful stuff keeps happening to people I love.  And it needs to STOP.  For a few months, as soon as I would hear a bit of bad news, I would find myself thinking, “Perhaps things will only get better from here.  Perhaps this is the last bit of bad news I’ll hear for a while.”  And then what do you know… More bad news shows up on my doorstep!  So if you have bad news to share with me right now…don’t.  Just kidding.  Maybe…

I will share just a bit about my wonderful friend from high school days, Emmett Stallings.  He found out on Valentine’s Day weekend that a tumor (that he lovingly nicknamed Arnie) has camped out in his esophagus and has made eating quite a challenge.  He is currently going through the first rounds of chemo and doing well.  The word “brave” does not even begin to describe what I think of Emmett and his wife, Wendy.  They are facing this with superhuman tenacity, peace, and down-to-earth-ness.  (Yes, it’s a word.  I just made it one.)  Sadly, because I’m still not very wordpress savvy, I don’t know how to create a link, so just go here to read his story: teamemmett.com.  You’ll be inspired.  And you’ll realize that the little (and big) things that have been bugging you lately aren’t really that big of a deal after all.

I don’t deal well with seeing others in pain.  I tend to take the pain upon myself, which I am pretty sure is part of how God made me, but if I forget to ask God to partner with me in it, it becomes a real burden.  And I do forget that sometimes.  I think I have a bit of a savior/superhero complex.  Because of the overwhelming amount of awful stuff that’s been going on around me lately, I’ve decided to see a counselor.  Tomorrow, in fact.  I’m not ashamed to tell you all that I’m going to a shrink.  I’ve done it before.  All of this is bigger than me, and I am willing to admit it and do something about it.  Just don’t expect me to recount in detail how each session goes.

No, Emmett, you did not put me into therapy.  But if it makes for a good story, I give you full permission to tell people that you did.  You are welcome.

As an effort to counteract the long string of bad news that has come my way, I am now going to list some things that have made me happy lately:

1. out-of-town visitors who stay for a long time

2. spring

3. blossoming flowers and trees

4. playing Guess What the Previous Owner Planted in the Yard

5. planting a garden with my good friends, the Hodgsons (and a few others!)

6. babies

7. three-year-olds

8. my students

9. my summer plans, particularly a trip to Seattle

10. looking forward to Seattle

11. looking forward to the garden growing

12. having a guest bedroom that is no longer Pepto-Bismol pink

13. conversations with far-away friends via email and/or skype

14. walks in Loose Park

15. going to the City Market

16. getting letters from friends I haven’t heard from in years

17. knowing that some amazing people I love have read this blog post

6 comments

  1. I’ve found your blog and it’s really nice to “know” you as a grown-up. I will enjoy reading your blogs and picturing you as “the little sister!” Seriously, thanks for sharing the words of your heart. We are alike in many ways, I think.


  2. Maybe this sounds counter intuitive, but write about the low times… I’m sure you can think of some way to express your feelings during those times as well as the up times. Personally, I think it’s no fun reading thoughts from someone who is always looking at the bright side…

    Just me, maybe.

    And also, bravo for embracing the need for therapy and doing something about it. I did.

    ❤ you, Allison, dear.


  3. I’m so sorry to hear that you’ve been so overwhelmed with the world’s ugliness. If you don’t see the bad, you’re in a bubble, and it makes the good that much more wonderful. God is bigger and more beautiful than all the ugly put together.

    I miss your face… feel free to come by Oak street for a visit. Would love to see you.


  4. Thank you Joanie, Mac, and Maria. Thanks for reading and for being okay with reading about the down times. If you read my next post, you’ll see that I’m hopeful for positive change, but still feeling the affects of the ugliness. My love to you all!


  5. Oh…is number 13 following our conversation??? Ahhhh so excited….never been mentioned in a blog before! In all seriousness Allison you are AMAZING and I would happily skype you every day if only our darn clocks would say the same time!! xx


  6. Yes, Sarah, you are #13 and #17! So you’re doubly blog-famous! Let’s do something about that time difference…



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